I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
This house was built for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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