No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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