You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
