his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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