we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize