Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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