I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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