do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
