I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
