This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i will never coherently bang her
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
