Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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