your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
