She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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