Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
