I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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