Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
i think my cat just said my name.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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