I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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