Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
