My liver just broke up with me...
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
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i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
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I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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