dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
