I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
