I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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