the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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