I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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