I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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