i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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