It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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