This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
where are my pants?
in the oven.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
