I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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