it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
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