Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
