my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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