I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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