Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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