Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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