You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize