They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
