Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
