white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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