He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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