this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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