Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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