if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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