you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
