would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
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There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
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You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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