Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize