Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
