it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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