Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize