weddingsv make me drug and hornr
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
